I decided on January 31st at just around midnight that I wanted to do a "30 Day Challenge" of no Facebook. Yes, I know February only has 28 days...
It has been 9 days and I keep finding it hard to not want to sign in. I don't feel like I need to sign in or anything. Even when I was using Facebook I wasn't constantly on it. But what I am noticing is how much social media websites really do connect us. It may not be as superficial as I previously thought either. I do still think some interactions are superficial, but it depends on the person I suppose. Maybe those people would have superficial face to face interactions as well. I also still stand by the fact that we shouldn't be reliant on social media sites as our main source of human interaction. However, I kinda miss signing in and reading about the little things my friends and family have been up to. When I can't physically be in all areas of the world to spend time with those I care about, I can follow their updates and feel close to them. I also miss sharing parts of me.
Of course there will still be those people who use Facebook to complain, protest, "advocate", get political, and be ungrateful, lazy little shits... Buuuuut, that's what the "remove from news feed" option is for. I digress...
I just keep telling myself "this is stupid". Why purposely avoid something that brings me closer to people? It isn't realistic to think that if they were "true" friends then we wouldn't need Facebook to keep in touch. As we grow older we all go on our separate paths. We start to focus on what we need to do with our lives (make a living, get an education, grow up) instead of what we want to do (hang out with friends constantly, have sleep overs, stay at home all day in our PJs eating cheese doodles). Unless of course you are lucky enough to have what you want and need be one in the same. My point being, we aren't in grade school anymore. Life isn't one big summer vacation filled with endless amounts of leisure time, alcohol, and sex. We actually have to survive now... on our own. Some of us still have support from our parents, but either way, most of us still know when it is time to take care of ourselves. Some of us get to balance being an adult and having a social life, for others, depending on our personal situation, don't get to have that choice. Some of us have to give up that choice in order to survive. And while we are working very hard to get to a point where we won't have to work all the time, sites like Facebook help us still have some form of connection with those we care about.
Facebook is what you want it to be. If you use Facebook to only keep in touch with family and friends, awesome! If you use it as a means to blog, super! If you use it as a way to network, wonderful! If you don't want to use it, good for you! For me, Facebook allows me to continue working hard for a better, brighter, future, while also showing me I have a support system. And I support every single one of my friends as well. Even if it has to be from a distance at the moment, it doesn't make them or me any less real because we use Facebook.
Now, if only the stubborn part of me would allow myself to sign in before the 30 days are up...
I believe Facebook will fade away soon then maybe we’ll recover to our own spontaneity. I wanna emphasize something that will explain overturned things which are recently rolling around in my head. When did you last time created tangible photo album in real life? or when did you take a picture without really thinking you do not post on social websites? Every day I'm seeing many woolgathering jaywalkers around because they addicted with their smart phones. Also, I highly recommend people instead of having silly mirror shots, figure out someway to stir up yourself and ask what the hell am I doing here! But the essential point in this connection, people should stop spanking themselves to emphasize how well-rounded they are or vice versa. If people really feel needy about attract attention, there are several ways to do it in real life. Personally, I don't care and I don't want to see whose updating their status every 20 min. shortly like: Damn my nail broke off or my high heels broken or I don't give a shit for your ripped laddered tights! I believe when we start to split something significant which are away than our populist megalomania then I’m sure someday we’ll find out our self-effacing side and life will draw attention on us by spontaneously.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your response, Mustafa! You see, that's the thing (for me at least), I do still take real photos, develop them, and make tangible albums. Social media hasn't prevented me from appreciating the small things in life. Every day I am present in the real world and enjoy the activities I partake in. I still travel, make real memories, and enjoy time with family and friends without being attached to my phone. I still have manners and respect. I am also a very deep, emotional, philosophical, science minded thinker. I wonder much more than just "what the hell am I doing here?" Facebook doesn't take that away from me. And though I do not enjoy reading mundane updates about nails, lunch, and who knows what else, who am I to rain on somebody's parade? Live and let live. We all have unique perspectives we view life from and those perspectives come from our life experiences. Let's not forgot that we are not all the same and just because you have a certain point of view doesn't make it the "right" point of view. If you don't like Facebook, don't use it. But don't be so quick to judge those who do. We all do things for different reasons. Sure, some people are hungry for attention... but instead of getting disgusted by it, let's stop to think about what they might have lived through to make them that way. What is their story? Let's extend our hand to get to know one another before placing labels.
ReplyDeleteSarah, thank you for opened this remarkable discussion in a different perspective. My whole point was trying to emphasize how I feel sorry for some people who missing the beautiful details because of they addicted with social websites. I think most of them causing to loose their skills for thinking outside the box. Since we become friends on FB I can clearly see that you appreciating the all small things, aware of the world around you and using that tool in a proper way. Even if you do not that wouldn't be my issue. I wonder have you ever tried to deactivate your FB profile? If yes I'm sure you faced with bunch of reasons before trying to leave and it's required you have to pick one or OTHER...Damn! it's not done yet! if you choose the OTHER option then you have to explain why?
Delete-I have a privacy concern.
-I don't understand how to use Facebook.
-This is temporary. I'll be back.
-I get too many emails, invitations, and requests from Facebook.
-I have another Facebook account.
-I don't feel safe on Facebook.
-I don't find Facebook useful.
-I spend too much time using Facebook.
-My account was hacked.
-OTHER
So how would you explain the reason for deactivate your account if your choice was OTHER? Fire at will! :)